If you’re been following along (I know….it’s been awhile since I’ve updated!), in January of this year, I shared that the couple who blessed us by adopting out our 5 remaining embryos was pregnant with twins. It’s been approximately 11 months since I shared that update and so you can safely assume, those two have come into this world and are living out the lives that God intended for them. They’ve impacted many in such a positive way already with their special story. They’ve also likely impacted their parents with lack of sleep and overwhelmed emotions of bringing home 2 brand new babies!!

Of course, I shared the exciting news with close family and friends when we learned of their birth this summer, but I never had the right words to take to the blog. So many emotions hit me when I got that email, sharing their names, birthday and precious, precious photos. My heart melted and a wave a gratitude and love came over me. I was so honored and humbled to be a part of their story. To have such a special, unique and ultimately unknown relationship and bond with these two lives was overwhelming. I wasn’t exactly sure how I felt about it all and wanted to be sure I got it right. I can honestly say now, months later, there has never been feelings of doubt or wonder if we make the right decision. I have never felt like they were in the “wrong” home. I never felt guilty of abandonment to them. For this, I am so grateful.

I have peace that Eric and I made the right decision, that we did what every parent strives to do and give their children the best opportunity to thrive in life. Now, I wouldn’t call these children “our children”. We may share genes with them and likely some physical traits, but they are 100% the children of their adoptive mom & dad. I hope that doesn’t come off as if I don’t think of or care for them. I just mean that I so deeply respect the necessary relationship & title boundaries and would never try to name them as “our children”. I only mean to say, for the time that they were ours, as embryos, we loved them like their parents do now and would do anything to see them raised up in a loving, healthy and safe home. And that’s the choice we made for them, and we are so very thankful that we did 🙂

When I tell people of our unique story I often times am met with awe and wonder. Most people think it’s “beautiful”, “selfless” or “neat” but couldn’t imagine being in the situation to make that choice. My response is what it has always been….it was our only choice. We could not even consider another option. I know that in today’s world it is controversial to consider embryos as life, but now living this out, seeing photos of two beautiful children that are a direct result of our decision for life, knowing a couple has grown into a family, I don’t have the capacity to see embryos as anything other than life. This is my story and my truth and although it’s “untraditional”, it’s beautiful.

I hope that more couples who have suffered infertility and have been ultimately blessed in growing their family, will consider embryo adoption a more realistic option. I understand it’s a very personal decision and can be hard to come to grips with, but just like anything else in this life, God will give you the strength to make the choice He’s calling you to make. Don’t be afraid to trust Him, don’t be afraid to have hard emotions about that calling and lean in to knowing that He has your best interest in mind.

To our 2 amazing genetic humans out there, I hope you will always know and feel how loved you have been and always will be. Not only by your mom, dad and extended family. Not only by us in South Dakota who may share some traits with you. But most importantly by the God who created you and knows your story better than anyone else. I think of you daily. I wonder what you each look like, the things you’re experiencing (and will continue to experience) as you grow, your milestones and the kind of people you’ll become. Always trust and know that God has big plans for you both. I hope to watch those plans unfold from a distance and one day know you both on a more personal level. Until then, you’re each in my prayers and a part of our shared story and our hearts.

With the sincerest and most selfless love,

Kayla